This is my diary as an ageing runner over the last week or so. It aims to capture the things that I notice as I live alongside my hypothesis for a while. I am collecting data in the form of accounts without going into interpretation at this point. That may come later as part of analysis. It may appear scattergun and without order.
Thursday 20th July 23
Another barefoot mile this morning. I feel that I am running well at the moment and that I need to try and explain why I think that is. What is my hypothesis? First thoughts are that I have developed a running style that I can manage and have found shoes that don’t affect it too much.
I am feeling like a self-experimenter today. Someone who takes ideas and tests them out on themselves. I think there is a community of self-experimenters out there. I have an urge to try and find them. I am not interested those who are just trying to make money from running. More those trying to do what I am doing. Those are the connections I want to make.
I took part in the Horwich Murder Mile tonight. Small event with a trestle table and about 20 competitors. I warmed up for a mile or so. It was a killer and rough underfoot which I did not enjoy. Glad to be back on tarmac. I felt I paced myself well. I was overtaken by a couple of young junior girls. Couldn’t live with them. I raced a chap to the finish I stood looking around. It felt fantastic to be doing this little local event. I stood sharing handshakes and slaps on the back with people I did not know. I felt great.
There was a presentation but I did not go. I have stepped into the social scene but that felt a step too much. It is. This is a barrier to connection which is playing on my mind and I think that I need to overcome. I am aware that I have felt very alone at Parkrun and other races.
A post later on Facebook said that I was first vet. Not sure how that works because I know someone older than me who finished ahead of me.
In my training plan, the Murder Mile does not feature. I justified it to myself as playing out. Doing something just for the joy and not the common sense.
I have noticed that my left knee is clicking as I walk uphill sometimes. No pain but new.
Friday 21st July 23
Up early and ran with Mac for 1.5 miles and then barefoot for a mile before heading down to the Friday Feeling 6am group. I could feel the mile from last night in my legs.
A runner came to the group who does not usually. They were worried about holding everyone up and kept referring to it. [I think it is a barrier to people attending the group…and other groups]. I am just happy to run at the pace of the group whatever that might be but then I am not in a position where I am going to be slowing people down.
One of the group suggested we do the 6 Towers race which he thought may be right up my street. I don’t think it is. It didn’t seem appealing and I began to wonder why. I looked back to events I have enjoyed and they have mostly been road races. A vivid memory was meeting Darwen Dashers and having a good go at the Garstang 10k together. Happy times that I miss. [I may need to join another club as a second claim so that I can find a slightly different tribe to do that sort of thing with too].
I found myself thinking back to a coaching timeline I did as part of a course following my doctorate. I timeline with memories of my running over the years. Highlighting the emotion and vivid times. How can I find some of that emotion again? What was it that sticks in my mind and makes me feel good when I look back?
During my barefoot run this morning, I found myself wording about the experts in the field who go down the whole toe bending flexibility route and whether that is necessary or are they just stepping into the knowledge gap. The world is full of experts and it hard to know who to believe.
Saturday 22nd July 23
My right ankle is a stiff this morning. Not sore tut stiff. I read something this week about older runners losing flexibility in their ankles. I think that is the case with me. I am always feeling like I need to manipulate and stretch my right ankle.
Torrential rain but 14 miles on plan. I put on winter gear and ran in rain over the moors. I had head down and realised I was grinding it out going uphill. Glad to be back though and have a hot soak (not something I do really). I lost myself completely in the run today. My mind was free and plotting and planning.
Slight niggle in my right calf for the last few miles. Not had that for a long time. I don’t miss the constant running with anxiety of injury that used to plague my running. Took my shoes off and ran the last mile barefoot
I read a post from meditations on getting older as a runner from Ann of @NLFellRunners. I tweeted The isolation that is part of injury. ‘An older runner feels invisible, slow, in pain’. Moving thoughts Ann. Thanks for sharing. – I think her post had an emotional effect on me. I am drawn in by the loneliness.
I also tweeted. One theory humans live beyond child bearing years is that groups benefit from the wisdom of older members and are more likely to survive. Ageing runners have plenty that is worth hearing. I am listening. [ think that came from a need to value and prize older runners who may be feeling as Ann was. It is unconditional positive regard. Maybe that needs to underpin the values of the CARP project]. I want ageing runners to be welcomed unconditionally, be valued and prized and allowed to be the people they are in their own right. We are individuals and not a homogenous group to be lumped together.
My body is very tired tonight. The miles and intensity this week have taken it out of me. For the first time, I am a bit worried about the mileage schedule of this marathon plan.
Sunday 23rd July 23
I am battered this morning. Just had it pointed out that voice is croaky. I am glad it is a rest day.
I read an article today about the link between dementia and hearing loss. I ended up going to the source material and writing a post about it. I tweeted. My first step into becoming a successful ageing runner is to get a hearing test. Didn’t predict that when I began. Such a simple thing.
I also posted on twitter and on facebook about running with an ICE wrist band. Got a generous response from runners who do and with advice on where to get one. I am going to get one that I can just slip on and off. I wouldn’t mind something a bit snazzy. It feels linked to identity and wearing it somehow connects me to being a runner as much as the safety aspect.
Ordered myself some new trail shoes today. Wardrobe shoes that will sit up there until my current pair wear out. I was experiencing anxiety about not having a pair ready when I need them. A bit like getting close to running out of petrol. I sit and wait for them to appear at a good price and then get them for a later date.
Monday 24th July 23
4.5 miles today. 2.5 miles and then last 2 miles barefoot. My soles are singing …but singing happy songs. I enjoyed the barefooting.
I booked a hearing screening test at Boots. I can go in tomorrow. First step into being an ageing runner.
Listened to a podcast today with Tom Mulchinock on Running Tales. I was struck when he likened running to the use of anti-depressants. It keeps your head above water when you are drowning and allows you to work on your life in other ways. He has found purpose by fundraising for CALM. That seemed important. Giving in some way. The podcast describes some people relying on running too much. It seems it needs to just be a part of your life and not all of it.
I added Luke Merrett’s blog to my connection page. He seems very genuine about sharing his love of running. What struck me was his story and his preference for minimalist shoes.
The name CARP (Chris’s Ageing Runner Project) came to me at the traffic lights this morning. I was thinking about longitudinal studies that make their data freely available such as ALSPAC. That is a very aspirational goal but why not think big. It gives this whole thing a name and emerging identity. I ended up writing a long post about it. Introducing CARP (Chris’s Ageing Runner Project). I want Ageing Runner to be underpinned by some proper social science methodology. Having a process to stick to also wrangles my flighty mind and keeps me coming back to the main thing.
Tuesday 25th July 23
I was up and writing at 5am this morning despite a late night. I am experiencing a creative burst of energy which I recognise . It felt important to describe and I sat for a number of hours until I got it down and posted it. Having a creative outlet and letting the fire catch hold seems important somehow in my being OK. I feel that am better for it. I feel more authentically myself.
Listened to Doctors Kitchen Podcast about Alzheimer’s today. The expert was saying that it is not a disease of the old, it is a disease of mid-life. It is just we see the symptoms in old age. The damage is started much sooner.
I went for my hearing screening test today. It seems I have moderate hearing loss in the upper range in both ears but the right one especially. I have no problem hearing noise, but I struggle with clarity. That sounded right. I went to the doctors to tell them and found them unhelpful. The doctor does not have time to refer me for a further test and there are no appointments even available for me to discuss it. I booked a further 75-minute test at Boots for early next week. I can navigate this but many people might struggle and not get the hearing aids they need. Hearing loss is linked to dementia which is the UKs biggest killer. Seems that it should be a priority to me.
I bumped into a friend who has just retired. He is missing the people and the banter. I chatted with him about how some runners feel the same when they get injured. I have an urge to do something to help. Maybe have an injured runners walking group as one of the options for our running club nights. Maybe that is where my volunteering life lies. I know that Age UK also look for people to lead organised walks.
I bought Shappi Khorsandi’s book ‘Scatterbrain’ today on her ADHD. I listened to an interview with her last week and a lot of it resonated with me particularly after reading Inger Mewburn’s post on neurodiversity in the academic world. I added them to the post I wrote this morning on burning the candle at both ends.
I ran with Tuesday Trailers tonight. I didn’t go with the 6-mile group. They were going up onto the tops. Not for me, I don’t think. I just didn’t fancy it. I enjoyed us taking our time and chatting with people. I ran there and ran back. My legs feel strong after the rest day. I was running back towards home and stopped to look at the landscape around me. I said out loud ‘This is quite a life you have carved out for yourself’. I feel lucky.
To date, the things I think are important for an ageing runner:
- Get a hearing test
- Wear an ID Band
- Give something in some way. Volunteer.
